Earlier today I was outside getting some sun, as I am told I should do, while wandering around pretending I had important things to do when I think I saw one of my ex therapists.
She was sitting at an outdoor cafe, reading the newspaper and eating lunch so I stared at her as I walked past. I guess she was really into the news or her sandwich because she didn’t look up and I couldn’t confirm that it 100% was her so I became a creepy spy. I stood nearby pretending to look at my phone like I was waiting for someone but I kept glancing over at the cafe. When I felt like I had stood there for too long, I walked past again as though I were going to one of the shops nearby. I suppose a normal person might have said hello or something like that but I didn’t really want to and although, after some good spying, I was more than sure it was her, there was still a tiny chance that it wasn’t. I wandered over to an ATM, checked my account balance and then found another corner to watch from but I couldn’t get a good view so I walked back. Again.
I know, I am really subtle. It must’ve felt weird for her if she was even aware that it was me. I walked with confidence but I felt like I was going to have a panic attack and I am not really sure why. I guess it was just odd to see her after all of this time, especially out of her office. It was particularly strange that she was eating lunch in a suburb near me, not at some fancy place around where I imagine she would live. As I passed her again, I felt like laughing. I was being ridiculous and if she was pretending not to see me then she was too. I wandered into a shop because I didn’t want to leave but I also didn’t want to just stand around spying on her and when I emerged, ten minutes or so later, she was gone.
I really wish she had noticed me.
I wish she had said hello.