It’s easy to mistake kindness for love and love for kindness. The key isn’t knowing the difference between the two nor being able to graciously accept when she is wrong but in being able to carefully manipulate the situation back to how she had originally perceived it. The bigger key is to make her momentarily doubt herself before she thinks she is regaining control when she was correct all along. This key belongs to me.
Her shoes are so comfortable it’s like they were made for me. I wear them and I pretend that I have been through all of her experiences walking alongside of, in front of and behind her. She’s so good at vanishing that I don’t even have to pretend to push her away. As far as she knows she is still in total control but she isn’t really. We’ll get into each other’s heads and mess things up again when I feel that the time is right.
We start closing in on each other’s lives gradually. It’s best to let these things drag on because she’s able to surrender to the whole spectrum of emotions until she eventually comes back to love.
Kindness is easy. She makes the first move and asks to meet up. I go along with it because it shadows my true feelings. She doesn’t believe that things could actually work out how she wants them to and so along comes doubt. We part ways again.
This is how we truly build a foundation- behind a veil and with time stretched out between us.
She dreams of validation and of ways to confess how she is feeling. Every original thought she has is chased by another thought of me and it’s hard for her to be subtle. When it’s all too much for her she thinks she’s manipulating me back into her life and I act surprised when she gives my purest, most-consuming thoughts a voice, “Don’t ever leave me.”
We both kindly let love be in control then.