I blog a lot about my friend who is pretty much my only friend. Usually I whine about how our friendship is fading and blah blah blah. Anyway lets give her a cool name for the sake of this post. How about Lil, as in Li’l Sunshine because she is a sunshiny person.
Lil’s partner has gone away for a week and she hates being alone, especially at night. She gets scared on her own. (She’s the total opposite of me!) When she told me he was going away, I said that if she wants to hang out or needs anything, I am always around. She told me that it would be really nice to have some company at night. I told Lil that I would drop in whenever she would like me to. ( I didn’t want to do this, especially at night but I don’t like to think of her feeling scared and alone with a toddler. She worries about noises that her house makes, people out on the street and stuff like that.)
Tonight I went over to Lil’s house and took her some dinner, ice cream, chocolates and lollies. I have this thing about eating with people. It gets bad at times, especially when I feel trapped and know I can’t just leave a situation if I feel uncomfortable. I never enjoy sharing a meal with people. I had to eat something though so I ate a little bit of bread and chicken. (This made everything worse a bit later.)
After dinner, and some playing with my toddler friend while watching some of “Let it Go” *edit* I meant “Frozen”, we put the toddler to bed. I tried to sneak out of the room as she was falling asleep (silence/stillness= not my thing) but Lil’s daughter wouldn’t let me so I had to sit in the room with my friend and wait for her to fall asleep.
Then came our adult time *edit* That sounds kind of dirty! We watched some movies but mostly we chatted for hours. My inability to eat much caught up with me. I was starving but I didn’t want to eat anything so I sat there hungry and dying for a cigarette. My friend doesn’t smoke anymore and I don’t want to smoke around her (like not literally around her but I don’t want to make her feel weird if I went out for a smoke.)
I was also very late for medication, considering I left her house at 1:00am and I have usually had all of my meds by 8:00pm. I kept hoping she would get tired and want to go to sleep but she didn’t or maybe she was just enjoying spending so much time with me. Eventually I asked if it was okay if I went home.
It’s now almost 2:00am and I am considering staying up all night because I am not tired but if I do fall asleep, I will want to sleep through all of tomorrow. If I don’t sleep then I will have one super tired and probably grouchy day but then I will sleep really well, right?
I don’t know.
Anyway, despite the sleep stuff up and everything else, I am glad I was able to make the night much nicer for my friend.
Hey god, did you see that? Remember it!