One of my biggest fears about dying is that maybe there wont be many people at my funeral. I know this is a stupid thing to worry about but I don’t want my last occasion to be really lame. I’ve been to four funerals and they were all packed with people who loved the deceased person. Well, I think they were all packed, I can’t remember one of them because I was very young.
From a personal point of view, I wouldn’t mind if only my family attended my funeral but I feel like the amount of people who attend is a direct reflection of how loved a person was and I don’t want society making a judgement over that.
I started making a list but seeing the names of people who know or have known me doesn’t really help. How much time can go by before, “S&S died, I’d better go to her funeral.” becomes “I heard S&S died like a month ago. That’s a pity.” or worse, “S&S died? Who was she again?”
I apologise for the ridiculousness of this post. I’m not in a good head space.