Firstly, it is him, not me. I may have held the knife but he did the chopping.
I think that’s what he wanted all along because then I have to wear the blame
and he looks like a deserted innocent (and innocence is not usually associated with him).
We’ve gone from daily, to weekly to hardly at all and in time we’ll be completely absent from each other’s lives.
I’ve become detached. I am in control.
I reply out of necessity to reassure him that I am still alive before he comes looking for me but my replies are brief and unemotional.
I need him to back away. I need him to understand that what we had was never okay and that everything changed when he made his dark confession.
I can’t be his person.