Mood Or Memories?

I think I am caught in a loop of emotions and I am beginning to wonder if sometimes I feel the way I do because along the way I have dropped stones and as I follow the same path back and forth, I keep coming across memories.

How can I determine if I genuinely feel low or if I feel low because of a pattern? It’s like when you associate people with songs, there’s always going to be a link there. Do my feelings of despair come from another year passing and not much changing or do they come from the memory of sad/hopeless moments?

I’m too connected to my past and I obviously need to go down a different path but I am afraid of the unfamiliar.

Maybe it’s the time of year, maybe it’s something in the air or maybe it’s all coincidental. Maybe my brain is just wired to feel down and I’m reading too much into all of this.


16 thoughts on “Mood Or Memories?

    • Yes, it is winter here. I really don’t cope well in winter, partially because of the cold/darkness, which encourages my isolation and feelings of gloom and also because of past events at this time of year.
      I honestly cannot believe we’re in June already.

      • So SAD is a strong possibility. It is hard to get use to, June for me is spring and the start of a glorious summer. There are ways to combat it, is your home dark? Can you go for a walk around noon? (bundle up) The light is important as is the exercise. During the darker winter months we tend to hibernate. Produce more melatonin (which makes us sleepy and lethargic. Less serotonin. Exercise and light help reverse that.

      • My apartment is pretty dark because I keep the blinds low, I don’t like people being able to see inside. I try to go for walks, I go to the gym a lot but that’s indoors. I didn’t know we produce more melatonin in winter. I take a melatonin-based antidepressant (Valdoxan) so maybe in winter it should be lowered?

      • light effects melatonin, it is produced in the darker hours, serotonin in the light, so in the winter more melatonin is produced, the balance is thrown off, exercise can help you produce more serotonin. If you suffer with SAD, chances are that you produce more melatonin than others may.

        you can use light therapy, this helps many to increase the hours of “light”.

        Valdoxan/agomelatine is sucessful in treating SAD. confusing isn’t it. 😉

  1. I always feel this way come spring. Its an opposite SAD disorder trait i think. Most feel lowest in the winter months, when their hope is least. I always feel Enlightened in winter; feeling like they are entering my realm.

    The spring is harder. To deal with the prospect of newness. Be surrounded by the Joie de vivre. The promise of new hope clashes with me. The knowledge of people pursuing newness, while I remain … where I always was.

    This is a great post. Looking deeper than you might imagine into a lot of peoples darker spots.

    Another great post

    • I always get blue in winter but I get what you mean about spring too. Spring scares me for similiar reasons to what you said.
      Here in the Southern Hemisphere, Spring starts in September so it always reminds me of the fact that the year is ending and everyone around me seems excited but I just feel depressed and scared.

  2. I remember feeling that way for years. Then it suddenly all shifted.

    I generally find that memories tend to come up when something is left unresolved and needs to be looked at.

    My two cents 🙂

      • Well, partly because of taking Bach Flower Remedies, but mostly because I forged a new belief system, and everything had to shift in order to accommodate it.

        It was traumatic at times, but I learned heaps along the way, though.

        Was it worth it? Absolutely. Would I do it again? Not if I can help it.

        If you need a hand, happy to help. 🙂

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